by Sandy Burkart

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Imagine you are on an airplane and sitting near you are two young children and a father   The children are out of control making a lot of noise, fighting with one another, and bumping your seat.  You can’t focus on a project you need to finish before the plane lands.  What infuriates you even more is the father is not doing anything about it!  He has a blank stare just looking out the window, completely oblivious to what his children are doing.   You want to give him a piece of your mind and tell him what a horrible father he is, but you refrain.  When you finally land at the airport you see an elderly couple with tears in their eyes run to greet the father and his children.  You are close enough to hear them saying that they can’t believe she is gone.  You realize that this man has just lost his wife and the mother of his two young children.  Your perspective on the situation completely changes.  Now instead of wanting to give him a piece of your mind, you have compassion for this man and his kids.  Your heart goes out to them and you wish you could help them.  A different perspective on a situation can turn your whole thought process and emotions in a completely different direction!

The “BIG-C” diagnosis can sure give you the initial perspective that “your life is fragile and you may not make it through this” –  It is certainly difficult to look at it in a different light but this can be done.   You could think maybe I was diagnosed with cancer to give my life new purpose.  Maybe this was my body crying out to listen to it and give it what it needs – rest, stress relief, emotional healing, loads of nutrients, detox, sunshine, and exercise.  Maybe this is just the beginning of a new and empowered life filled with dreams, goals and a happier and healthier ME.  Maybe this is time to let my loved ones know just how special they are to me. 

A study done in the Netherlands https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30192384/ concludes that patients with an optimistic attitude had a better health-related quality of life and better survival rate than those with a pessimistic attitude.  This is great to know, but how do we do this?  Let me share a few thoughts from my own journey in regarding perspective. I would love to hear your experiences in the comments!

At first I was really scared.  I could barely even say the word “cancer”.  I clung to God’s word even though my feelings were still laden with fear.  I immediately went to Romans 8:38-39 “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus.”  As I fed on God’s word I actually became excited that I got cancer!  What?  Excited? That definitely was not “me” thinking, but rather the Spirit of God in me.  I was excited because I know in Romans 8:28 that God says he causes all things together for the GOOD of those who love God, according to His good purposes.  This WILL be used for good in my life so I could be excited to see how God will use it. 

About a month and a half later I got my biopsy results.  I really thought there was no cancer in my lymph nodes and I wouldn’t have to worry about chemo and radiation.  WRONG!  Again I became scared and did not want to go down this road.  Feasting on the word again and listening to Christian music, I eventually accepted that this was by the Sovereign will of God, and that this was part of the journey, and He would strengthen me every step of the way.  Also, self-love is SO important.  I caught myself being disappointed in my lack of faith and getting mad at myself for not being calm.  I had to learn to fully rely on God for all of this and not myself.  I also had to learn that God completely understands our humanness and He was not disappointed in me at all.  He was the one building my faith through it all not my trying to muster up enough faith.

Fast forward about a month after my surgery and I was diagnosed with a mild case of lymphedema (lymphatic fluid builds up in your tissue and causes pain that can lead to cellulitis).  I only had a 15% chance of getting lymphedema from the removal of 9 lymph nodes from my left arm area.   Now I had to take precautions so that it would not flare up and get worse or debilitating.  Well, a few months later it flared up right after I finished chemo.  Now I had to wear a lymphedema sleeve ALL the time (except when I slept) for the rest of my life!  I got angry and annoyed about it.  One day as I was just going about my business, a thought popped up my head – Bethany Hamilton.  Bethany, a professional surfer, lost her arm by a shark bite at the young age of 13.  In an MTV interview clip after the end of the inspirational movie Soul Surfer (see link below),

So how do we get a healthier and more optimistic perspective? 

1. Start to see how this can be used for good in your life and in others.  Journal, draw or paint your thoughts.
2. Find other survivors who are positive, “hang around them,” and – listen to them.
3. Keep a journal of everything you are thankful for.
4. Recognize that trials of this life lead to pearls of wisdom that you could not gain any other way but through suffering. 
5. Commune with God.  Get to know Him better.  As our knowledge of God increases, our trust in Him grows exponentially.  This is a process and cannot be rushed.  Below is a downloadable version of a Bible study that really helped me to grow called, “Knowing God.”  I actually do this study online with other cancer survivors, if you are interested in joining let me know. 

In closing, let’s look at James 1:2-6:

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.  So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.  If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.  But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone.

Please be sure to comment below.  I would love to hear your experiences and thoughts

DISCLAIMER AND DISCLOSURE:
This blog does not provide medical advice, nor is it a substitute for medical advice given from your Doctor. The information written about is from my personal experience and for general information.  My hope is that this will help you come up with questions for your discussions with your Oncologist, Naturopath, Integrative Doctor or other medical personnel.  Please use this as a catalyst to help you research further items discussed.

There are some links in my blog that are associated with affiliate links which means I may receive a small compensation for products I recommend.  As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Please note that I only link items that I personally use and love.